Leading on Empty – A Survival Guide for the Leader Who Can’t Stop
🎧 Episode Description
Have you ever looked at your calendar and realized you booked every minute—even your rest? Jim Burgoon shares his own burnout story and introduces REST, a four-step framework to help leaders recognize red flags, evaluate energy gaps, schedule micro-rests (and mini-Sabbaths), and team up for accountability. If you’re leading on empty, this episode gives you practical, Scripture-anchored habits to reclaim your strength and lead with purpose.
🔑 Key Takeaways
- REST Framework: Remember R.E.S.T. – Recognize, Evaluate, Schedule, Team.
- Recognize Red Flags: Watch for exhaustion that won’t break and a hollow prayer life.
- Evaluate Energy Gaps: Track cortisol spikes vs. true recovery minutes.
- Schedule Rest: Use short, frequent micro-rests and protect a weekly mini-Sabbath.
- Team Up: Build a triad for mutual accountability, support, and growth.
📖 Scripture Anchors
- Mark 6:31 – "Come away... and rest a while."
- Hebrews 4:9–10 – The promise of Sabbath rest.
- Galatians 6:2 – "Carry one another’s burdens..."
📣 Connect & Engage
- Subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio
- Leave a review on Apple Podcasts
- Share this episode with a friend
- Subscribe, like, and comment on YouTube
- Join our newsletter → www.leadwithjim.com
🎙️ Got a question? Leave a voice message at leadwithjim.com/ask
Thanks for listening!
Remember: Leading on purpose, not on empty.
Transcript
Have you ever found it a struggle that when you got off work, when you were done your meetings, when you were done, all the things that you couldn't rest, that you found other things to do, that you struggle to actually take a moment for yourself because taking a moment felt unsafe?
Speaker A:Well, that's what we're going to dive into today because I was at that place and it cost me my health.
Speaker A:So I want to help you so it doesn't cost you yours.
Speaker B:Welcome to Online Business for Christian Creatives, the show that helps you build a business that honors God, fuels your creativity, and actually pays the bills.
Speaker B:I'm your host, Jim Burgoon, leadership coach, Faith first, entrepreneur, and a guy who's made just about every mistake so you.
Speaker A:Don'T have to let's get into it.
Speaker A:As we dive into this episode today, I want us like, basically go over an acronym for you, because acronyms are rememberable.
Speaker A:So the acronym we're talking about is rest.
Speaker A:So we're going to go into R. We're going to recognize those red flags, E, we're going to evaluate our energy gaps, S, Sabbath, Take Sabbath, micro rest.
Speaker A:And T, we're going to team up with accountability.
Speaker A:Because here's the thing, you can't do life alone, nor can you trust yourself to rest when you're a higher achiever.
Speaker A:And by the end of this episode, we, we're going to really unpack what rest is.
Speaker A:We're going to sit there and help you understand how to rest or at least look for the warning signs of burnout and how to respond correctly.
Speaker A:And then maybe, just maybe, you'll get some revelation that you need to rest and that you're going to do it.
Speaker A:Why?
Speaker A:Because rest means I'm prioritizing me so that I can help more people.
Speaker A:So let's dive into the first ring, recognizing red flags.
Speaker A:And this is going to be signs that you're leading on empty.
Speaker A:Like for the first starters, the first sign, chronic fatigue.
Speaker A:Now, chronic fatigue really is when you rest or when you sleep.
Speaker A:It's not restorative.
Speaker A:You're always tired, you're always empty.
Speaker A:You have brain fog.
Speaker A:This is going to be a major sign that you're not taking care of yourself.
Speaker A:And that burnout is probably at some point imminent.
Speaker A:But because like I remember when I was first starting down that journey, I was pastoring a church.
Speaker A:I was a new church pastor.
Speaker A:I was a church planner.
Speaker A:I was teaching middle school, like sixth, sixth, seventh grade.
Speaker A:Ish.
Speaker A:And I, my wife was having her health conditions and all of these things And I thought it was the bright idea to start a blog at the time.
Speaker A:And I called it Soul Care for the Misfits.
Speaker A:So I was doing all of this stuff, and what I wasn't doing was resting because everybody needed me, everybody wanted something from me.
Speaker A:And I had to make sure that I was helpful and impactful because my growing up, because of the trauma I had been through, has been.
Speaker A:It made me believe that if I wasn't helpful, then I wasn't worthy.
Speaker A:So what I did was I dove into this, and then after doing this for a long period of time, I found that I was getting tireder and tireder.
Speaker A:And it wasn't.
Speaker A:Every time I would sleep, there was nothing coming back to me.
Speaker A:I was not rejuvenated.
Speaker A:I was not restored.
Speaker A:And eventually, what led.
Speaker A:It started as a trauma response of just always helping people, people pleasing.
Speaker A:Ended up in insomnia and ultimately burnt out.
Speaker A:And I lost my health.
Speaker A:And now, 15 years later after that, I'm trying to recover my health, but my body is in a place of autoimmune disease and all sorts of stuff.
Speaker A:So we've got to look for red flags.
Speaker A:And one of the major red flags is the chronic fatigue.
Speaker A:Another red flag is feeling disconnected.
Speaker A:Not only just emotionally, but you're also going to feel disconnected relationally and so spiritually, because when you can't rest, you have nothing to pour out.
Speaker A:When you are not pouring into yourself, you are disconnected from everything.
Speaker A:You feel empty.
Speaker A:You feel like prayer is hollow.
Speaker A:Let's just call it what it is, guys, because here's what I know.
Speaker A:You're never going to overcome the things that are holding you back until you recognize and admit what's holding you back.
Speaker A:So if that be the case, we got to understand that prayer feeling hollow is not a sign of your spiritual demise, but what it oftentimes is, is a sign of your spiritual emptiness because you've not rested.
Speaker A:And the Bible is very clear on a command, we are called to rest and to work from a place of rest.
Speaker A:And so if you're feeling disconnected, it's not because there's something inherently wrong with you.
Speaker A:It's the decisions that you and I have made that have caused us to basically run on empty.
Speaker A:It's like a car that and you and you.
Speaker A:You probably been in this place, because I.
Speaker A:There's times where my car is on E and I'm like, I can go a little bit longer.
Speaker A:It says 15 miles, and I'll try to push it 15 miles.
Speaker A:And then you realize at mile 13, that the meter was wrong and it ran out of gas and came to a stop.
Speaker A:Now think of our bodies like that.
Speaker A:Our bodies are constantly running on E. And at some point it will stop.
Speaker A:And in the midst of trying to stop, you feel disconnected, you feel hollow.
Speaker A:The Bible just feels heavy.
Speaker A:Relationships just feel like a burden.
Speaker A:And then you, you as a high achiever, because I spent a long time as a higher achiever doing this.
Speaker A:We feel as if we're somehow deficient or we're problematic because we can't do the things that we once did.
Speaker A:That's a red flag.
Speaker A:And your body is telling you slow it down, get rejuvenated or the body will shut it down and cause you to rest.
Speaker A:And I promise you, being on the other side of that problematic situation is that you want to make the intentional decision to rest before your body shuts you down to make you rest.
Speaker A:The two are not the same.
Speaker A:And if you're on the other end, where I was, where my body shut down to make me rest, it takes years and years to recover.
Speaker A:And you're never going to be back at the level you once were.
Speaker A:But if you're intentional and you say I'm going to rest, you can maintain the level that you're currently at and maybe even increase level.
Speaker A:But you've got to listen to those red flags.
Speaker A:You've got to listen to the places that are screaming, you know, like help, help.
Speaker A:This is not a car check engine that you saw come on, the light come on and you just ignore, don't ignore those red flags and make sure you're evaluating them.
Speaker A:And the second things is that we keep pushing, right?
Speaker A:This is where E comes in.
Speaker A:This is where we're going to evaluate energy gaps because we keep getting in these loops of high demand, low recovery, high demand, low recovery.
Speaker A:Because every time there's a demand on my system, it's a cortisol spike.
Speaker A:Every time there's something I need to do, it's a cortisol spike.
Speaker A:And without true rest, the demand feels harder because your, your body's hormones and your body's way of adapting has never got the reset it needed in order to start over at a place of baseline.
Speaker A:Because if you're always in a deficiency and you're constantly spiking your cortisol, you're constantly depleting your dopamine, you're constantly in this place of people pleasing perfectionism and you don't know how to no, that'll be a whole other episode is the fact that no is one of the Most spiritual things you can do and one of the most self care things is learning to say no.
Speaker A:But we're going to digress from that.
Speaker A:But we're gonna, we spike cortisol because we keep getting in these places where people are demanding more of us.
Speaker A:And we're saying yes because we don't know how to say no.
Speaker A:And we, we mistake adrenaline rushes for energy.
Speaker A:We mistake guilt for purpose because we live in these, these places of, or these cycles of people pleasing.
Speaker A:We live in these cycles of perfectionism because of base trauma that we had when we were growing up.
Speaker A:That we get adrenaline rushes.
Speaker A:And if you get the adrenaline rushes and the cortisol spikes and then you're going, going like yeah, this is great.
Speaker A:And then you realize it wasn't true energy from rest, it was these spikes.
Speaker A:So you just as high as you got the energy, you crash just as hard.
Speaker A:And then there's the guilt for purpose.
Speaker A:And I think this is going to be even another conversation at some point you and I have to have because we are guilty, whether it be our traumatic past or even ourselves that we need to perform.
Speaker A:We need to be high, we need to be perfectionist, that we need these things, that we mistake it for purpose.
Speaker A:And God gives us a purpose to say this is what your assignment is on your life.
Speaker A:But here's the deal.
Speaker A:We, we feel so much of a burden, we feel so responsible, we, that we take the responsibility out of God's hands to try to do it on ourselves.
Speaker A:And then all we do is we're getting guilty, we're killing ourselves because we're not recovering.
Speaker A:And then when we can't perform, we're somehow feeling like we're failing God.
Speaker A:We're somehow feeling like we're missing our purpose.
Speaker A:And then we go back to the rest.
Speaker A:Now we're disconnected from all of those feelings.
Speaker A:We're numb.
Speaker A:And what started out as God given purpose is now just this thing that we torture ourselves with.
Speaker A:So we've got to constantly evaluate energy gaps.
Speaker A:And I will say for men, the men who listen to the show, we suck at evaluating our energy gaps.
Speaker A:Women are a whole lot more in tuned and better at this.
Speaker A:But men, we suck at this.
Speaker A:We ignore it.
Speaker A:We have to become adept in emotional fitness.
Speaker A:Now it's emotional intelligence, but I call it emotional fitness because I want to be in an active state of fitness as opposed to being an intelligence and knowing about it.
Speaker A:So in emotional fitness we've got to be hyper aware of how we feel, where our energy depletions are, where our Vampires, you know, the things that suck our energy are.
Speaker A:And then we have to be able to evaluate that so that we can do something about it.
Speaker A:So I would suggest if you're in this place to do what's called an energy audit.
Speaker A:And this is, is where you're gonna, you know, you're gonna look at the demands of last week, look at your calendar, look at everything you did on top of your calendar that you didn't place on your calendar, and then give it like a 1 to 10.
Speaker A:One being it didn't really wasn't a demand on your energy 10, meaning this was the highest energy output that I can have.
Speaker A:And then start calculating after every time you did this, how much rest did you take to recover?
Speaker A:And I'm gonna promise you, and I'm gonna say true rest, because sometimes we do things and we call it rest.
Speaker A:No, we're talking true rest, what fills you up.
Speaker A:And I want you to notice the gaps.
Speaker A:And you're going to be surprised because the gaps are going to be big, but they're not going to be overwhelming to the point where it's, I'm going to lose myself in it.
Speaker A:We can do things because once we know about it, we can do something about it.
Speaker A:If we don't know, we can't change, and if we can't change, we stay in these broken cycles.
Speaker A:So you're a cycle breaker.
Speaker A:So let's break these cycles.
Speaker A:So we're gonna, we're gonna rest, right?
Speaker A:We're gonna look for red flags.
Speaker A:We're going to evaluate these things, the energy gaps, which really kind of comes back into understanding, like even.
Speaker A:And then we're going to move into which is the S, which is Sabbath micro sections, micro rest.
Speaker A:But you know, scripturally, Jesus said this, he said, he said, come away and rest a while, right?
Speaker A:Mark 6:31.
Speaker A:And this was the bridge version.
Speaker A:And, and one thing that we realize as we talk about the Sabbath micro rest and we talk about evaluation of energy, is that Jesus never apologized for taking rest or respites or breaks.
Speaker A:You shouldn't either.
Speaker A:I don't understand.
Speaker A:No, I do understand because we have to be trauma informed as leaders, not only just for those that we lead, but for ourselves.
Speaker A:And if we're trauma informed, we understand that we overly apologize for things that we think are a burden and we don't want to be a burden, so we over apologize for it.
Speaker A:But guess what?
Speaker A:Taking moments of rest is more about self care than it is anything else.
Speaker A:So don't apologize for things that are going to make you healthier or better.
Speaker A:Don't apologize for things that are going to hold yourself accountable.
Speaker A:Even if somebody's response is negative or emotional, that's on them, not you.
Speaker A:Because I'm going to make sure I'm the healthiest I can be for the people God's called me to.
Speaker A:Not the unhealthiest.
Speaker A:For the people that are just energy suckers or energy vampires or these people that keep wanting more and more but are never satisfied.
Speaker A:We're going to say no to those guys.
Speaker A:And we're not going to apologize for actually taking rest, because rest is part of our calling.
Speaker A:God taught on the seventh day said to rest.
Speaker A:Jesus in the scripture said, come all you who are heavy burdened, I will give you rest.
Speaker A:Right?
Speaker A:These are not suggestions, but basically invitations that say, yeah, if you're going to do the life in Christ and the life of God that really is in your heart, your vision, that then you need these things in order to fuel said heart and vision.
Speaker A:So take the rest and don't be apologetic about it.
Speaker A:Which brings us into the next thing.
Speaker A:We've got to take micro rest.
Speaker A:Now.
Speaker A:There are people that were like, I'm taking all of Saturday off and that's perfectly fine.
Speaker A:If you want to do it all in a day, then you do all in a day.
Speaker A:But you have to take micro Sabbaths, micro rest.
Speaker A:And it's like, here's the thing, there's a difference.
Speaker A:There are people that are, are in a healthy state that can do that.
Speaker A:They'll take 45 minutes or they'll take all we.
Speaker A:They're not 45 minutes.
Speaker A:They'll take Saturday and Sunday.
Speaker A:They don't do any work.
Speaker A:They work Monday through Friday.
Speaker A:They're good.
Speaker A:But me being on the other end of chronic illness with autoimmune and just different things like that, I have to do microburst.
Speaker A:My Sabbath is not a whole day because some days I have a flare and I miss days.
Speaker A:Like there's times where I can't create a podcast or create.
Speaker A:Can't create content because my flare is so intense.
Speaker A:It's just crippling at times.
Speaker A:So what I need to do is a lot of times, because I'm going to monitor my energy is I'm going to take micro rest for every one to two hours I'm working, I'm going to try to take 30, 45 minutes of rest.
Speaker A:Whether that sometimes is just sitting and watching an anime because I love anime, or we play a video game because that's something I enjoy doing.
Speaker A:And if you're somebody who plays video games, let me know what your favorite, your favorite video game is.
Speaker A:Whether you hit me in the email or hit me in the comments.
Speaker A:If you're watching this on YouTube.
Speaker A:What's your favorite video game?
Speaker A:Because I'm a gamer, love gaming and it really fills me up.
Speaker A:Or I'll play like puzzles or different things like that, you know, because I'm trying to take micro rest.
Speaker A:There was a time I never did.
Speaker A:There was a time I thought it was stupid.
Speaker A:Then my body gave out on me and I realized what I called it stupid wasn't was incredibly important to the health and well being of who I am.
Speaker A:So now I'm forced to take them.
Speaker A:And so I will do the one to two hours and then I take my rest.
Speaker A:Because here's the thing and during that rest time I'm going to tell you like, here's a couple strategies that you and I can get better at is like breathing.
Speaker A:Breathing has been known to really help reset cortisol, calm stress, reset your parasympathetic nervous system, all of that stuff.
Speaker A:And I'm not just talking like the regular breath in and out.
Speaker A:I'm talking like the actual intentional like box breathing and all this other stuff.
Speaker A:There's so many different techniques.
Speaker A:My wife is amazing at this stuff.
Speaker A:I wish, or I'm actually hoping to get better and learn from her and other people.
Speaker A:Because breathing is inherent to who we are.
Speaker A:We have to breathe to live, right?
Speaker A:But if we can be intentional in certain types of breathing, it actually can calm down our system.
Speaker A:So learn to breathe.
Speaker A:Number two, get up and move.
Speaker A:Walk, stretch, stretch overhead.
Speaker A:Get the body moving, get the body stretching.
Speaker A:Make sure you go to the gym a couple times a week and then you know, mind your energy drops.
Speaker A:You know, you're going to want to make sure that in your Sabbath time like that you understand where your energy drops are and your energy spikes.
Speaker A:Work on the spikes, take breaks at the drops so that you can kind of balance that out.
Speaker A:And remember, micro sabbaths don't have to be whole days.
Speaker A:Because as a high performer, you and I both know that a whole day could be a wasted day.
Speaker A:Because we have a bad mindset around that.
Speaker A:Because we have to change our mindset to say no.
Speaker A:A whole day could be just sharpening the ax for the rest of the week.
Speaker A:Or what we can do is make sure that we're taking Sabbath times every day.
Speaker A:Whether it be the 45 minutes after 2 to 3 hours of work or just taking a 90 minute break after you're done a project.
Speaker A:Make sure though, I will tell you, make sure that there's no screens, make sure that there's no work talk like don't do anything that's going to cause drainage from you.
Speaker A:Like if you are playing a video game, obviously that is a screen.
Speaker A:But don't do anything that's going to take more from you.
Speaker A:What you're going to focus on is do things that are going to push more into you.
Speaker A:Maybe take a walk in n picture, maybe read whatever that is.
Speaker A:Because we are going to make sure that we're prioritizing our health, not others priorities.
Speaker A:So then we come into the last thing which is the t, which is we're going to team up for accountability now from a.
Speaker A:We're going to form like a triad, you know, like a, like there's a trinity.
Speaker A:Father, Son, Holy Spirit.
Speaker A:We're going to kind of model that because we want like a two peers and maybe a mentor and coach in our life.
Speaker A:Because the peers are going to be our, you know, the equivalent us on the same level.
Speaker A:They're going to be people that are going to be like, hey, you need to rest, rest.
Speaker A:Make sure.
Speaker A:Are you taking rest?
Speaker A:You know, they're gonna, we're gonna hold each other accountable.
Speaker A:We're gonna be in community, we're gonna pray.
Speaker A:Hey, can I pray for you kind of thing.
Speaker A:Is there something you need?
Speaker A:How can I help you become more accountable?
Speaker A:And then you're going to need like a mentor or a coach in your life at some point.
Speaker A:Because the mentor coach is the person who's going to come in and say yo, you need to stop this and you need to start doing this because if you don't, this is where you're going to happen.
Speaker A:Now that is very valuable because it's basically circumcising the flesh of the heart.
Speaker A:It's meaning there's going to be a little pain from that coach or mentor but ultimately it's for our benefit.
Speaker A:So we're going to need that type of person in there.
Speaker A:And, and you know, you don't need to do this every day with the coach.
Speaker A:You can do monthly or quarterly check ins with your peers.
Speaker A:You can do daily, you can do weekly, you can do monthly.
Speaker A:It's all about how you can set up with your friends.
Speaker A:And it's because you're going to share energies because these are reciprocal relationships.
Speaker A:Energy in, energy out.
Speaker A:I give you, you give me.
Speaker A:Now that's going to be another thing is as a high performer you struggle with being able to Receive.
Speaker A:We're gonna have to work on that because you need to learn to receive as much as you give.
Speaker A:If not learn to receive more than you give to balance it out, because you often.
Speaker A:You ultimately give a lot.
Speaker A:So we want to make sure that's balanced.
Speaker A:But you're gonna do that.
Speaker A:You're gonna do prayer requests.
Speaker A:You're going to celebrate each other.
Speaker A:Because we perform best in community, we flourished in shared vulnerability.
Speaker A:That's Galatians 6:2.
Speaker A:We really flourish in shared vulnerability.
Speaker A:So find people you can be vulnerable with.
Speaker A:Find people you can trust.
Speaker A:It's going to lift you up, and you're going to be able to lift them up.
Speaker A:So it's reciprocal.
Speaker A:So let's.
Speaker A:Let's take a moment as we.
Speaker A:As we kind of go down and end this episode, because this was chock full with a bunch of good stuff.
Speaker A:I want to give you a journal prompt, you know, and basically your journal pop.
Speaker A:Go through the rest.
Speaker A:And I want you to notice your red flags.
Speaker A:What have you ignored?
Speaker A:Where did you see the biggest energy gap?
Speaker A:What.
Speaker A:Which rest step will you implement first?
Speaker A:And then I want you to really kind of pray through that.
Speaker A:I want you to think through that.
Speaker A:I want you to roll over on that.
Speaker A:And then when you're done all that, I want you to send it to me in an email.
Speaker A:Jim leadwithjim.com Just give me a little synopsis of where you are and how I can pray for you and support you.
Speaker A:And then with that being said, I think if we do this together, if you and I work on who we are, our identity, we will find fulfillment in purpose, not guilting ourselves to do something on purpose.
Speaker A:That's the big difference between the two, because God is really in your clothes, in your corner, and I want you to understand that.
Speaker A:And if you and I can really get the health side and work from a place of rest, we're going to see God's blessing in a bigger way.
Speaker A:And with that all being said, I. I just want to pray for you and just say, may, may the God of peace give you true rest.
Speaker A:And may he just.
Speaker A:May Holy Spirit just teach you how to rest.
Speaker A:And what true rest actually looks like for you, not just what it looks like for anybody else, but for you.
Speaker A:And that your soul is renewed and that.
Speaker A:That God refuels and reawakens your calling, exposes the guilt and reminds you that he is your savior, your leader, your guide, your mentor, and the person who's going to take you where you need to be.
Speaker A:And so may God help you keep leading.
Speaker A:May God help you do it on purpose and not from a place of emptiness.
Speaker A:And may all that happen in the name of Jesus.
Speaker A:As I appreciate you hanging out with me today on this episode, look for a look for other episodes coming in.
Speaker A:And I've got a new thing happening on my website which I'm excited about.
Speaker A:I want to share with you.
Speaker A:It's www.leadwithjim.com forward/ask a s k. All of this will be in the show notes, by the way, if you want to check those out.
Speaker A:And what what's going to be on that page is the ability for you to either send me a written message or a voice memo to really kind of ask a question.
Speaker A:And if I use your message in any shape or form, I will shout you out on the show and say, hey, so and so asked this question.
Speaker A:Let's kind of talk about it.
Speaker A:Just want to make sure that let you know that's a new thing coming out on my website.
Speaker A:It's going to be available shortly, but I'd love to hear your voice.
Speaker A:I'd love to hear from you.
Speaker A:With all that being said, I look forward to you being with me on the next conversation we have.
